Visiting time

no appointments until July 9th so I am at my sister's for the long Canada Weekend!

Innisfil!!

Here is a valuable owl knowledge along with something that is hard to do sometimes.

Owl Knowledge

Trying my best!

To all my Canadian friends, HAPPY CANADA DAY WEEKEND!!

Cupcake Cake!!

Have a safe one my friends

it is called my bitching blog for a reason

my depression is getting deeper now that I have no income coming in.  how will i pay my rent?  bills?  and once I can't afford to get my medication I will really be fucked.

the best part will be the withdrawals trying to find a reason to stay alive is going to be the hardest part of all.

i'm done, i am aware people are worse off with cancer etc but this is my blog and my feelings and therefore I can bitch, cry, whine and release my feelings on here.

Another Day

Now don't be shocked... I am cooking dinner!  No junk food tonight!

There is this very easy quiche recipe you can put whatever veggies in and I haven't made it in forever, but felt like it tonight.

update on meeting with HR

Well even with the 2 doctors notes, I may still have to return to work.
Work has to go with the insurance company's opinion, even though my doctors will NOT sign off on my return to work.  I don't know what I am going to do, I have another thing for the doctor to fill out but no money to get him to fill it out.  

Shannon would have me move up north without anything but still owe my landlord back rent, so I need to have a job of some kind as she is the important one to pay back first.  

I have Shannon looking into a job at her work come October and hopefully I will have things wrapped up here, either with my appealing the insurance outcome or with CPP and ODSP.

Homework UGH!!

Well this week we have to keep a journal with the percentage of how uncomfortable we think things that cause us anxiety are going to be then how bad they really were.  We have to do something out of our comfort zone everyday this week until class on Monday.

1. Tuesday; going to a busy mall and ask people for directions on where to find the ink filling store.
2. Wednesday is my meeting with HR at work which requires 2 buses to get there and 2 back.
3. Thursday I am going to do some packing which will freak me out with the what if I might need this crap.
4. Friday I am going to tackle my bedroom, pack stuff not being used 
5. Saturday I am going to do the closet in my room and in the main hallway
6. Sunday I will attempt house work.
   
   This is not going to be a fun experiment!

June 10th

Today is Social Phobia class day, I don't like this group very much but it is a required group for my mental health... my own choice.

It is in a small room with many people and all of us quiet due to our social anxiety issues lol  it isn't funny but it is on this side of the table.

Wednesday I meet with HR at my office, I have 2 very strong doctor notes stating I can not return to work at this time and it is not sure when I will be ready to return.  This has me terrified if they don't switch me to the new insurance company I will have to move as I will have no money for anything and the thought is terrifying but exciting that I could be moving up north now rather than the end of August which is my estimation on when I should hear back from the government.

Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers, light a candle for me for this to work out.

May Goddess keep you in her arms and your Angels keep you safe.